Expectations

As interactive beings, we often hold either high or low expectations of each other. We hold expectations of ourselves, of others, of our spiritual source (GOD), of our government, of a location, of even a thing.

Expectation is a strong belief that something will happen or be true in the future.

Our personal experiences, preferences, programming, conditioning, and conclusions—all derived from the immersion of our social environment—form the foundation of our expectations, which are natural human instincts.

Expectations can be either productive or destructive. They can play a role in determining what happens, help us prepare ahead, and contribute to expressing a goal-oriented behavior OR they can also lead to disappointment when reality or people don't match up to what we had hoped would happen. 

You bet you’ve made statements like, “You should have done this or that,” or “I expected you to _______” (fill in the blank), and then set yourself up for conflict with yourself or the other entity involved.

Don’t worry about sounding professional. Sound like you. There are over 1.5 billion websites out there, but your story is what’s going to separate this one from the rest. If you read the words back and don’t hear your own voice in your head, that’s a good sign you still have more work to do.

Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your story is that it’s going to continue to evolve and your site can evolve with it. Your goal should be to make it feel right for right now. Later will take care of itself. It always does.

You tell yourself that you would never allow yourself to feel disappointed by the actions or inactions of the other person but you end up repeating the pattern.

So what’s the way out of such an unhealthy cycle? How do you let go of expectation of others and avoid the drama it brings?

Here are a few actions to take:

• Inward Emotional Tracking: Shift your attention from others to what you feel when you interact with them.

Notice what you feel when your expectations are met versus when they are not met. The most effective way to do this is to notice what you’re feeling without speaking or acting.

• Resist Impulsive Behaviors: Avoid criticizing, objectifying, explaining, reacting, clarifying, withdrawing, or becoming angry, and you will be surprised at how powerful and painful some of the physical sensations in your body are.

As you become better at feeling, observing, and learning about these physical sensations, you will be less interested in shouting, withdrawing, judging, and other ways to distract yourself.

…because expectations are a natural human instinct that cannot be totally avoided, one of the best ways to handle them is to focus on developing emotional awareness of yourself. Eventually your emotions will become more intriguing to you than what appears to cause them.

When that happens, your expectations will disappear naturally, and you will not even notice that they have been released.